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ลำดับตอนที่ #17 : Chapter 15 : The Glowing Air
Invisible Moon
Chapter 15
The Glowing Air
“Even the air can have its own glow.”
#WINisWIND
I was nervous as I walked out of my dorm this morning. It was my first time doing my own hair and makeup. Luckily my new haircut - done by the UNISTAR hairstylist - was easy to manage, so all I needed to do was just apply a bit of hair gel and it already looks good.
Since P’In had done my makeup yesterday, I simply followed what he did. I spent almost an hour on my face and the result seemed acceptable. At least I looked much better than usual.
At first, I was a bit shy walking through the campus. I was used to being ignored and unnoticed, like the air flowing, invisible. It felt awkward when everyone was looking at me as if I suddenly emitted a bright light around me. I wasn’t used to this kind of attention.
I was a little uncomfortable because many students were pointing at me and squealing away.
“Hey! Who is that boy? So cute!”
“He must be a Cute Boy! Do you know his name?”
“I’ve never seen him before, but he’s very cute. I can’t believe I’ve never noticed him before!”
“OMG! Who is he? Which faculty is he from?”
At first, I was planning to keep my eyes down and quickly walk away, however, I was reminded of my determination before I got to university. I had intended to change myself, now that the chance was here, I should take it in stride.
I took a deep breath, trying to be brave, and smiled at that group of students.
Suddenly...
“Ahhh!”
They were all screaming and rushing towards me. I froze, shocked.
If I had known that it was going to be like this, I wouldn’t smile at them. Seriously!
“What’s your name? Which faculty?”
“You’re so cute! May I take a photo with you?”
I was surrounded by the students who were talking and taking a photo with me. I forced a smile but couldn’t let any word out. All the words seemed stuck in my throat. It was difficult to get used to being in the centre of attention like this, I had no idea how to reject them politely.
Eventually, I managed to arrive at my faculty building. Apparently, I was half an hour late.
On usual days, being late for a class wasn’t a big deal for an invisible person like me. Nobody even noticed when I got in the classroom. However, I forgot that today was different.
As soon as I went in, everyone including the teacher turned to me.
“I…I apologise for being late.” I raised my hands to pay respect and apologise to the teacher.
My classmates looked confused.
“Who’s that? A freshman?”
“Wait…I haven’t seen him before.”
“Is he just coming today?”
“Wow! He’s so attractive!”
“Do we have such a cute classmate?”
I scanned for an empty seat, trying to ignore the whispering. I saw a seat near Boss’s friend, so I went there.
His friends were waving their hands, greeting me, but they seemed to think that I was a new student. They didn’t recognise me as the fading Win.
“Oh? Wait. Is that you? Win?” Boss asked in a surprised tone. Looks like Boss was the only one who could recognise me.
“Yes, it’s me.” I nodded.
As expected, everyone was shocked.
“What? It’s Win! Ahhh~ What did you do? How did you suddenly become this good-looking?”
Parn was screaming loudly. She got the whole classroom’s attention.
“Be quiet! You’re still in class.” The teacher knocked on the table. So everyone fell silent, and went back to focusing on the subject. Still, some people turned to look at me a couple of times and were whispering with their friends excitedly. I wasn’t used to it at all.
During lunch break, I once again became the centre of attention.
“Is that really Win? Actually, you do look like you from before, but what made you stand out today?”
“Yeah! If I knew that you’re this good-looking, I’d have flirted with you a long time ago.” Parn teased jokingly, causing others to glance at her because of her shameless talk.
“Well, I just cut my hair, applied some makeup like the influencers did…”
I couldn’t tell them that P’In had helped me. Because I didn’t want everyone to misunderstand that P’In was unfair. I wouldn’t allow any negative rumours to affect his reputation.
“Hmm, cosmetics really do wonders.” Boss smiled. His words surprised me, but his friend defended me.
“It isn’t only cosmetics, if his facial features aren’t originally good-looking, no matter how good the makeup is, it wouldn’t help much either.”
“Well, plastic surgery doesn’t count,” Parn added.
“I agree! I think this hairstyle suits Win.”
I could only smile at them. I really wanted to interject, but everyone kept going on and on, so the former fading me couldn’t even interrupt. I could only listen and smile. Well, I still had a lot to do to improve.
After lunch, while we were on the way to the afternoon class, my friends were talking about the Moon preliminaries.
“Actually, when I heard that Boss and Win were both nominated as the faculty Moon candidate, I thought Boss would be selected for sure. But now, I don’t know anymore.”
“Right, I’m rooting for both of them. Having a friend as a Moon is so cool!”
I forced a smile while glancing at Boss. I could sense that Boss was a little different today. He was usually cheerful, but now he was being so quiet. Perhaps, I was thinking too much. Sometimes, people would need some time alone to think without being interrupted.
Today, while the rest of the freshmen were attending the orientation session, Boss and I had to go to room 300 for the faculty Moon preliminaries instead.
I used to dream of becoming the Moon. I had always wondered what it would feel like, and now, the opportunity had presented itself to me, but it felt surreal, like it was part of a dream.
I was standing in front of room 300 with Boss. There were also 3 beautiful female freshmen waiting with us. They must be the nominees for the Star candidate.
“Hi! How are you?” Boss greeted them casually. Boss might be the only one who knew all of the business freshmen, and they seemed to know Boss as well. However, they were glancing at me with a curious expression. Perhaps, they thought they hadn’t seen me before.
“Hello, freshies! Sorry to keep you waiting.” P’Noey came with the name list of nominees for the faculty Moon and Star.
“Sawadee ka/krub, P’Noey.” We raised our hands to greet her.
“The teachers and IN are inside now,” P’Noey said. “The Star nominees can come in first. The Moon nominees will need to wait outside for a while. I’ll call you in later, once they are done.”
When the girls heard P’Noey mentioning P’In’s name, they became so excited.
Boss and I then sat on the chairs that were prepared outside.
While waiting, Boss decided to talk to me.
“Did you prepare anything for today?” Boss asked.
“Well, no, I haven’t. I didn’t expect to be selected, so I was too shocked to think of anything.” I told the truth because I had never imagined that I would be a Moon nominee. It was really unexpected.
“I see.” Boss replied flatly. So I asked him back.
“What about you? Did you prepare anything?”
“I also didn’t expect that I’d be selected.” Boss smiled.
“So I haven’t prepared anything either.”
“Oh, I see.” I nodded, feeling a little relieved. Turns out, I wasn’t the only one who hadn’t prepared in advance.
We were waiting in silence for about ten minutes before the Star nominees came out of the room. The result of the winner was shown on their expressions. One of them was obviously looking so happy while the other two were forcing a smile, their eyes showed some disappointment.
“How was it?” Boss asked them.
“P’In and Mr. Chana selected Nina to be our faculty Star. Congratulations, Nina!” They both said to Nina.
“Oh really? Congratulations, Nina! So is Mr. Chana part of the committee as well? The selection was over pretty quickly.”
Boss was so friendly with them, while a person who lacks social skills like me could only stay silent.
“Thank you, Boss.” Nina smiled at him.
“Well, the process wasn’t that serious. Mr. Chana and P’In just interviewed us with a few questions. They decided based on how we answered.”
“Yeah! Nina’s answer was so impressive.” One Star nominee said.
“P’In is so handsome! OMG! How could he be that handsome?! This is the first time I’ve seen him up close.” Another said. I’m absolutely certain that she is P’In’s fan.
“The Moon nominees, please come in.”
We heard P’Noey calling us in. Boss waved goodbye to the girls, and we both entered the room.
I started to panic the moment I stepped inside. It was a medium-sized conference room, with three chairs placed in the middle. P’In and Mr. Chana were both sitting on the opposite side. Besides them, there were also other teachers and a few other seniors around. They were here to watch the preliminaries.
I swallowed hard. The atmosphere seemed like the audition that I saw on a TV program.
“Please sit here.” P’Noey gestured us to the seats, and we became the focus of the room.
I sat on a chair facing P’In and Mr. Chana, the committee observing us.
“Sawadee krub Mr. Chana, Sawadee krub P’In.” Boss was raising his hands to pay respect as usual.
I followed him as soon as I realised I hadn’t greeted them.
“You…you’re Bodin right?” Mr. Chana was looking at a piece of paper with Boss’s photo.
“And you. Archawin? Huh? Your photo is quite different from the real you.”
I tried to smile. I had no idea how to tell him that I had just received a makeover.
“Alright, then we’ll start now.” Mr. Chana said.
“Our business faculty Moon and Star selection process isn't really complicated. Normally, we just let a senior who had experiences, like Intrakorn, select eye-catching freshmen with help from the teachers. Today, we’ll just interview you, to see how you answer the questions, and to determine whether your mindset and attitude are appropriate for our faculty Moon or not.”
“Do we have to perform a special talent?” Boss asked and I shuddered.
If we had to perform, I would be in serious trouble. I hadn’t prepared anything at all.
“Don’t worry about that.” Mr. Chana smiled.
“Because when you become our faculty Moon, Intrakorn will help to train you, in special cases.”
I sighed with relief.
“Well, in order not to waste any time, I’ll start with a question for you two.”
Boss and I paid attention to what he was about to ask.
“What makes you unique? Why are you good enough for me and Intrakorn to select you as the Moon?”
His question made me think hard. No wonder he was the branding and marketing lecturer. The aim of the question was to allow the Moon nominees to present themselves like presenting a product to clients — Why should we buy your product?
Hmm… What is it about me? What made me unique?
“Oh, Bodin, it looks like you are ready to answer. Please go ahead.” Mr. Chana saw that Boss was eager.
“Alright,” Boss said.
“I think what makes me unique is, I am multi-talented. I can play almost every kind of sport and my results are quite good. I also did some music. I used to play the guitar for the high school band. I believe that the person who will be the Moon has to be perfect in everything. Especially talents.”
I was dismayed by his answer. If it was true, then what about me? If it was true, there was no way I could become the Moon.
Mr. Chana nodded after Boss answered. He was noting something on a paper, while P’In stayed still, no expressions shown on his face.
“Archawin? It’s your turn.” Mr. Chana then turned to me.
It took me by surprise.
“I…” I felt awkward.
I almost said something stupid like I didn’t know what made me unique. However, I saw P’In looking at me, so I swallowed that answer.
P’In had selected me. If I said that stupid answer, I would ruin his reputation.
During this short moment, I was trying to recall the many quotes from all the books that I had read. One of the lessons I learned from many pieces of literature was - everything in this world had both positive and negative sides, nothing was the worst or the best, it depended on how we looked at it. This sort of attitude lets me live in this world happily, without making me depressed from the drawbacks I experienced.
Regarding this, perhaps, my fading characteristic was unique in its own way.
“I have a distinctive characteristic, unlike everybody else.”
I answered. Mr. Chana seemed to be a little interested in what I was saying.
“Really? Well, please tell me more.”
“Alright.” I was trying to compose my defence.
“Since I was born, I was always a fading person, invisible, and forgotten. I barely got anyone’s attention. When I bought something, the shopkeeper would not notice me. When I was walking, I was often bumped into as they couldn’t see me. When I got in a queue, people took my spot as they thought nobody was there. Sometimes, my friends also forget to accept my Facebook friend request…”
My story caused laughing sounds that broke the silent atmosphere.
Mr. Chana seemed to be surprised and was more curious about my story.
“But you’re good-looking. How is that possible?”
“Actually, I usually look like the photo you saw.” I explained as I unconsciously touched the back of my hair.
“Recently, I just learned how to do my own makeup and hairstyle. So my appearance improved.”
“Oh, right. Your photo is very common.” Mr. Chana was staring at my photo.
“At first, I was very curious why Intrakorn chose you. But seeing you today, I think you look really attractive. Intrakorn indeed has a good eye.”
“Thank you!” I raise my hand in gratitude. Mr. Chana praised me directly, making me shy and happy. But the shyest happiness was the fact that I could be standing right here because of P’In.
“The story of your character is fascinating.” Mr. Chana continued. “Anyway, could you explain how your fading characteristic would be suitable for our faculty Moon?”
I was silent for a second, glancing at P’In. He was also looking at me. So I turned to look away and blushed.
If P’In was just like any other normal Moon, he wouldn’t be able to get a firm hold on DomKati’s heart the way he did. P’In was the invisible Moon, this made him unique because no one could be like him.
“Because I had been a person who wasn’t outstanding before, I have a different perspective on things. People who were good-looking since they were born would have never known how bad a fading life was. As a result, if I can be the Moon, then I could be an inspiration for many people who are pursuing their own dream…”
Thankfully, I could answer it smoothly. I couldn’t believe that I really spoke those words. It was as if there was this determination that had been suppressed deep inside me for a long time, and it decided to reveal itself here.
“If even the fading me can become the Moon, nothing is impossible in the world if you put your best effort and don’t give up.”
I sneaked a peek at P’In, because he was my inspiration as well.
Mr. Chana cracked a smile with my answer and noted something on the paper.
“Alright. That’s all from me. It’s your turn, Intrakorn.” Mr. Chana passed the baton on to P’In.
I became more panicked when it was P’In’s turn.
“Bodin,” P’In called Boss in a monotone, looking at him.
“If you become the Moon, what do you want to do?”
His question was short and simple. It was a popular and easy question, though it wasn’t easy to guess what kind of answer P’In was expecting.
“I have many things that I want to do as the Moon,” Boss said smoothly.
“The Moon is like a public relations representative of our university. For example, I like sports, so I can promote to encourage many students to exercise and care about their health more, as well as to avoid drugs. I want to be a good role model for the younger generation.”
His answer sounded like the perfect answer for the ideal Moon. Mr. Chana scribbled on a paper while P’In didn’t say anything, his face was still emotionless.
“Archawin.” P’In then turned to me.
I flinched as he called my first name.
I was preparing for any kind of question. I guess he would ask the same one as Boss — if I become the Moon, what do I want to do? However, the problem was I had to answer differently from Boss. Otherwise, they would think I copied him. Then, what should I do? Boss’s answer seemed perfect.
“Do you want to be the Moon?”
In the end, P’In’s question was simpler than I thought.
I blinked, realising that it wasn’t the same question as Boss’s.
“Ahh…this…depends on your judgement.” I avoided replying. It was indeed a difficult question.
If I said that I wanted to be the Moon, it would be too direct.
If I said that I didn’t want to be the Moon, it would shut down my opportunity.
“Tell me honestly.” P’In however, forced me to answer. Although his expression was calm, his voice was firm.
I swallowed. Did I really have to say this?
“If…If I could be the Moon, I would be glad. But if I can't, I will accept your decision.”
I tried to answer a little more without being too direct.
P’In was quiet for a second, then he earnestly glared at me.
“If you want to, I’ll let you be. If you don’t want to, I’ll give it to your friend.”
His voice had no expression, but every word he uttered shocked us. Everyone in this room stared at him in unison.
What did he just say? I widened my eyes.
If I wanted to be the Moon, he would give me the Moon position.
If I didn’t want to be the Moon, he would give the title to Boss instead.
His decision depended on me? Seriously? Now I was shocked too.
“Do you want to be the Moon?” P’In repeated his question.
I was still in a daze. However, the way P’In looked at me felt like he was digging deep through my hidden aspiration. So I couldn’t deny my desire anymore.
“I indeed want to be the Moon.” I finally admitted.
This was the only chance for a non-existing air like me to become the Moon. I shouldn’t just let this chance slip away without trying.
“Then why?” P’In asked for the reason.
Why did I want to be the Moon? My answer was actually so clear.
Because I wanted to be a Moon like P’In.
“Because I want to motivate everyone.”
I thought of P’In. He transformed an air like me into a glowing air.
“I believe that everyone in this world has a very beautiful dream. But many of them would think it’s impossible, so they decided to give up. It’s the same for a fading person like me. I dreamt of becoming the Moon but I never expected that I’d be standing here, today, being interviewed like this. So I want to share my story, to tell everyone that everything and every dream can become a reality if they keep their determination and don’t surrender their own dream.”
I explained lengthily. I could breathe easy again now that I’ve said everything that was on my mind.
P’In was a motivation for his fans to willingly build up a better world together. P’In had established an unseeable positive power that created waves of strong social movement.
If I could be the Moon, I would do the same things P’In did.
If there were people who felt unconfident, I would inject confidence in them.
If there were people who felt discouraged, I would encourage them to stand up and move forward.
I received this power from P’In, so I would like to pass on this power to anyone who needed it.
I didn’t want to just be a tranquil air. I wanted to be the wind that blew the positive power, passing inspiration to everyone, and motivating them to keep moving ahead to reach their own dreams.
P’In and Mr. Chana both nodded at my answer.
They were writing something on paper, then P’In looked up at me.
“I choose Archawin.”
I felt as if P’In’s words made me float. I couldn’t explain how I felt exactly. It was exciting, rejoicing, pleasing, and —
‘I choose Archawin.’
This short sentence declared that P’In chose me to be the Moon, but for me, it meant more than that.
P’In accepted me.
This was the first time that I had been accepted by someone, and that someone was a UNISTAR member who was loved by many people, and someone who I admired so much.
“Congratulations!”
Boss’s voice pulled me back to reality.
Although his mouth was congratulating me, his expression was the exact opposite. I was left speechless, not knowing how I should respond.
I understood what Boss was feeling. If I were him, I would be disappointed too. But I couldn’t do anything either.
If I said sorry, it would seem like I was mocking him.
And it didn’t feel right to console him either.
Honestly, I felt guilty. I was worried that Boss would feel bad either way. It might take some time before I could talk to him about this, without hurting each other’s feelings.
“I agree with Intrakorn.” Mr. Chana said, as Boss and I waited for him to elaborate.
“I didn’t mean that you aren’t good enough, Bodin. I like you too. And Intrakorn shares my thoughts.”
Mr. Chana was looking at P’In’s note as he said it.
“If our business faculty want to win the university Moon. I’ll definitely choose you, Bodin.”
Boss’s expression brightened as he heard those words.
“You have all the attributes that would be perfect for the university Moon. You have an outstanding appearance and plenty of special talents. Not to mention it’s easy for you to become popular with your character. If I choose you, at least this year, you’d be in the top three of the university Moon position for sure.”
Although I was Boss’s opponent now, I also agreed with Mr. Chana.
I peeked at Boss, whose face showed signs of doubt — then why wasn’t he chosen?
“However, we aren’t just looking for the university Moon.”
Mr. Chana said, clearly.
“Our goal is the UNISTAR contest.”
I widened my eyes as he said that.
“Bodin, I’m a very direct person, so I’ll just be straightforward with you. Don’t think too much about this, okay? Just imagine that this is a marketing lecture. Your character is too popular, do you understand what I mean? I believe that most universities will send Moons that are similar to you to the UNISTAR contest.”
I followed Mr. Chana’s analysis. It seemed reasonable because each university would have a general standard of ideal university Moon — the same for every year, the same for every university.
“Bodin, you can probably be the XU Moon, but I think it’s less likely for you to become one of the 9 finalists in the UNISTAR contest.”
Mr. Chana was way too direct. Even I felt a little hurt for him.
“Unlike Archawin,” Mr. Chana turned to me, my legs were shaking a bit. Would I get a cruel critique too?
“For you to win the XU Moon position, Intrakorn probably has to train you harder. This is the most difficult step. However, if you can get through that, I believe you would easily make it as one of the 9 finalists for the UNISTAR contest.”
As if Mr. Chana’s words had a mysterious power, I suddenly felt goosebumps rising all over.
“Archawin’s character is one of a kind. As a result, if you can win the university Moon, you’ll stand out in the UNISTAR contest. Most University Moons are the popular type — handsome, tall, good shape — but your small, cute, flower boy character will be distinctive.”
Small, cute, flower boy? Was I really that type?
“Archawin, it was difficult for me to decide between you and Bodin. However, I’m impressed by your interview. I believe that you have a unique character and story.”
I automatically raised my hand to thank him for the compliment. I had never gotten this much praise before.
“Bodin does have a higher chance of winning the university Moon position. However, if we take the risk and put Archawin against other faculty candidates this year, he has a better potential to qualify for the UNISTAR contest.”
Mr. Chana was looking at me and Boss.
“So, if I need to pick one of you, I’ll pick the one that could bring in bigger results, even if it’s more challenging.”
Then, Mr. Chana smiled at me and nodded.
“Congratulations, Archawin! You’re this year’s business faculty Moon.”
☽------------☽
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