UNISTAR : Invisible Moon [English Version]

ลำดับตอนที่ #31 : Chapter 29 : The Way to Reach the Moon

Invisible Moon
 

Chapter 29

The Way to Reach the Moon

"Just by staying under the warm moonlight,

the wind is filled with happiness."

#WINisWIND

What if I wished to be more than the wind under the moonlight?

What if I wished to be the wind staying by the moon's side?

Would the moon accept my wish?

"P'In..." I said his name lightly.

P'In stayed quiet for a while after I confessed everything in my heart.

P'In seemed to have come to a realisation. He looked at me with various expressions. I had no idea what was on his mind.

Later, he just turned his face the other way and called my name.

"Win." His voice sounded shaky while my heart was shivering.

"Want to be a UNISTAR?"

I was surprised by his question, right after I confessed to him.

"Do you want to?" He repeated and gazed at me.

He was waiting for my answer.

I didn't understand why he wanted to know, but I still asked myself.

At first, I thought I wanted to be the Moon because I was wondering what it felt to be in the limelight. But now, I finally realised that it wasn't the reason.

The happiness that I was looking for was something else.

I just wanted to be with someone who understood me.

"If I can be, I want to." I answered.

Since I was bullied by anti-fans, I had already given up all hopes of winning the UNISTAR contest. I didn't want to ruin P'In's reputation anymore.

It was just me being greedy. I couldn't deny it.

If I could become a UNISTAR, I would be able to stay with P'In longer. This was the main reason.

Nevertheless, the expression in P'In's eyes seemed pensive. As if it wasn't what he expected to hear.

And I couldn't understand why.

"If so, it's impossible." P'In said, looking up at the sky, far away. His expression was hard to guess.

Impossible? It wasn't a harsh word, but it was like a sharp knife stabbing into my heart.

"UNISTAR...idol...makes us...impossible." P'In continued without looking at me.

Even though he uttered word by word, it was still an incomplete sentence. But I thought I understood what he wanted to say.

Right. P'In was a UNISTAR. He was an idol. To idols, their image was the most important thing. And we are both men. That made our relationship impossible, just like he said.

I finally got his answer.

Right now, I figured I made him feel distressed. He might not know how to reject me without hurting me. P'In was such a caring person. He didn't want me to feel sad. So he gave me an indirect answer.

I felt like I just woke up from a sweet dream. Yeah. It was such an unrealistic dream. We were both male and an air like me didn't deserve to be with him at all. It was simply impossible.

I was so miserable, but I tried to hide it and acted normal.

P'In had come here just to console me. He was very nice and helped me a lot. How could I expect anything more from him? This was already good enough for someone like me.

"I see, thank you for your answer," I said, controlling my voice.

P'In turned to me. He looked confused, which made me more heartbroken.

My heart wanted to stay longer here with P'In, but I was so afraid. I was afraid I would cry in front of him. I didn't want him to pity me.

"P'In...my clothes are wet..." My voice was shaking.

"I want to go back to my dorm...to change it."

I decided to leave. This was the only way I could escape.

I needed some time alone.

"I'll walk you back," P'In said, trying to follow me. But I stopped him.

"Thank you, but I'd rather go by myself," I said.

"I...don't want other people to misunderstand us."

I was afraid I would ruin his reputation even more.

My words made him stop. I didn't want him to see my sad expression. So I lowered my head and rushed away.

I was running to my dorm as fast as I possibly could. I couldn't think of anything except locking myself up in my room and crying alone. Crying would be the only way to release my sadness.

"Oh!" I wasn't careful, so I accidentally hit somebody on the way.

"I'm sorry," I said hurriedly, however...

"Hey! N'Win!" The familiar sound called me. So I looked up.

He was a tall man. He wore casual clothing and covered his face with a face mask and a cap. At first, I had no idea who he was. But later, I could recognize his looks and his voice.

"P'Wayu!" I exclaimed, and he suddenly covered my mouth.

"Ssh! Not too loud. Today I don't have class. I just went to buy stuff. I didn't do my makeup today, so I can't let anyone see my face." P'Wayu said seriously.

He looked around. He seemed to be paranoid.

I saw that he was holding a plastic bag. It carried a bottle of cola, a lot of snacks and a box of ice cream. P'Wayu just bought something to eat. However, I still thought that no matter how much he wanted to conceal it, his appearance was still outstanding. Unlike P'In who could be invisible at all times without even trying.

When I thought about P'In, I felt more heartbroken.

"Hey? Are you okay? Why are you making such a sad face? And why are your clothes so wet like this?" P'Wayu asked, and raised his hand to hug my shoulder in a friendly way. I felt a bit nervous.

"Do you have time? Let's eat something delicious." P'Wayu smiled at me.

"Where to eat?"

"My dorm." He said. Without even waiting for my answer, he just dragged me to his dorm.

"P'Wayu. Well, I need to get changed first." I tried to give an excuse.

"No worries. You can borrow my shirt, just change it in my room." P'Wayu insisted on inviting me.

"Uh...P'Wayu..."

At first, I intended to refuse, but right now I was too tired. So, I just let it be.

Perhaps, hanging out with P'Wayu might help to relieve some of my depressed emotions.

P'Wayu's dorm was in the same building as P'In's but on a different floor. His room was on the 7th floor, number 717. I followed him in, but my mind was still distracted.

"Welcome!" P'Wayu smiled and pressed the keycard to open the door.

However, as soon as I saw his room, I was so shocked.

Was it a rats' nest or something? Why was it so messy?

I took a look and swallowed hard, it wasn't just a normal level of untidiness. It was extremely messy. Many kinds of stuff were placed randomly, with almost no space to walk. There was also some garbage, and a pile of unwashed dishes.

"Come in!" P'Wayu said. He took off his cap and mask, revealing his bare face to me for the first time. Actually, it wasn't bad at all. He had such smooth skin. Only his eyebrows and his mouth were a bit paler compared to when he did his makeup, and his hair wasn't styled. That's all.

I really wanted to tell him he didn't need to worry that his fans would leave his fandom because of his bare face.

In fact, his messy room was much scarier.

I walked in carefully, trying not to step on his random pieces of stuff on the floor.

"Sorry it's a bit messy. It's from the fanmeet a few days ago. I got so many gifts and I was too busy to tidy up."

P'Wayu said while clearing some stuff on the sofa to make space for us to sit.

I knew UNISTAR had a fanmeet every month. I understand if he didn't have time to arrange the gifts from his fans.

However, what about unwashed dishes and the garbage?

P'Wayu seemed to read my face, so he laughed nervously.

"My manager sends a maid to clean up every Sunday. Today is just Thursday."

I was surprised. He even had a personal weekly clean-up service. But, if it was already extremely messy on Thursday, I didn't even want to think of Saturday.

It's not surprising that his manager actually hired a maid for him because I don't think anyone could stand this level of dirtiness.

P'Wayu was probably too focused on his makeup and hairstyle that he had no time for cleaning.

"My agent gave me this T-shirt, but I haven't used it yet. You can wear this. Your hair is soaking wet, so you can use this towel and the hairdryer in the bathroom."

P'Wayu took them from his wardrobe in the bedroom.

I'm not going to mention how messy his bedroom was...

"Thank you krub." I took it and went to the bathroom, which was very messy as well. You could see cosmetic and skincare products everywhere, but at least it was still clean.

I took off my wet shirt. It was still wet, but wasn't soaking wet anymore. my pants were still fine to wear. I put on the new T-shirt that P'Wayu gave me. It was a purple T-shirt with DomWhai logo on it. I figured it was one of those merchandise MW made and the UNISTAR members got them for free. However, P'Wayu didn't have a chance to wear it.

Well, it would be a bit strange to show off that he was also in DomWhai, his own fandom.

I dried my hair before walking out.

"Done?" P'Wayu looked at my T-shirt with pride.

"Welcome to DomWhai! Hahaha."

I gasped. This also count?

"Come here, let's eat something good."

P'Wayu tidied up his dining table. He had so many snacks. Most of them were obviously from his fans, as they were accompanied with notes like 'love you P'Wayu' and 'Hope you enjoy,from Dom Whai'. I guess even his fans knew that P'Wayu loved eating so much.

I became curious about that 'something good' that he mentioned earlier.

He took out two tall mugs, as well as a bottle of cola and a pint of ice cream that he just bought.

"Do you know which 'lava' is so sweet and mellow?"

He asked me. I suppose it was some kind of lame joke again. However, my brain couldn't process it, so I couldn't think of anything.

"Which lava?" I immediately gave up.

"la-nil-va, vanilla." He winked and opened the pint of ice cream.

I was numb for a while. This could even count as a joke? Seriously?

"Wait, not funny?" P'Wayu seemed to have lost his confidence a bit.

"And do you know that there's a more delicious 'lava'? Can you guess it?"

"What's it?" I asked back without thinking.

"la-kil-la-no-va. Vanilla-Cola. Hahaha." He just laughed at his own joke.

"Vanilla and cola?" I tried to figure it out.

"Yep. It's the supreme combination."

P'Wayu dropped a scoop of vanilla ice cream into the mug.

"Oh? Why don't you put the ice cream in later?" I was curious. I had seen only cola floats – a cola with a scoop of ice cream on top.

"No. This one is better. Corn fit. Corn firm." P'Wayu said and opened a bottle of cola.

I assumed 'Corn fit. Corn firm' was just P'Wayu's way to say the word 'confirm'.

"Look. Put the vanilla first, followed by cola."

P'Wayu slowly poured cola into the mug, when the cola reached the ice cream, it became fizzy like beer bubbles filling the mug.

"Here. Try it." P'Wayu handed the mug with a straw and a long teaspoon to me.

"Thank you." I was nervous as P'Wayu was staring at me and waiting for me to taste it. So I just dipped into the bubble with a spoon and tried it.

"Oh...So yummy!" I widened my eyes. It was a new taste that I hadn't experienced before.

It was like a fizzy whipped cream, mixing the taste of cola and vanilla ice cream. Compared to the common cola floats, where we just eat ice cream with cola, this one was special because of its bubbles.

"Try to drink. Cola and vanilla taste great together." P'Wayu cheered.

"Okay." So I sipped it.

The mixture of cola and vanilla taste was the absolute best. Although the intense taste of cola was reduced, it was replaced with the mellow taste of vanilla.

Vanilla-cola was a nice beverage for releasing stress. Next time, I would buy and try it myself.

"Do you like it? It's cool, right?" P'Wayu smiled.

"Yes. I love it!" I smiled back.

"I have a lot. You can have as much as you like."

"Thank you very much."

Although P'Wayu usually made too many lame jokes, right now I felt better because of him.

We sat together at the dining table, drinking vanilla-cola.

After having such a sweet drink, I felt so refreshed.

"Actually... I saw what happened on Twitter."

P'Wayu started on the subject, causing me to pause.

"Don't worry about it too much." P'Wayu shrugged.

"It was just a slander post."

"P'Wayu..." I was a bit surprised. Because I didn't even need to explain and he already believed me.

"Everything will be fine. Be patient." P'Wayu patted my shoulder.

"P'In is preparing for a press conference."

"What? P'In?" I was stunned when I heard it.

"Yep. Actually...it's weird." P'Wayu seemed puzzled.

"P'In usually doesn't like to do any public interview. If it isn't necessary, he would avoid most of it. But I heard after he found out what was happening to you, he immediately asked P'Kwang to help. He requested a press conference and is planning to personally explain everything."

P'Wayu looked at me with a serious expression.

"P'In is really worried about you. Moreover, your UNISTAR contest is just around the corner."

When I heard this, I felt even more guilty.

P'In was such a nice person, and I ruined him. P'In wasn't even angry, he even tried to help me.

How could I expect more from him? He had already done so much for me.

"Just wait and see. The one who slandered you, and deceived DomKati with such ugly fake news, P'Kwang wouldn't let them go easily." P'Wayu seemed angry as well.

However, P'Wayu trusted me a lot. He tried to make me feel better by inviting me in. P'Wayu was so good towards me. So, how could I lie to him?

"P'Wayu krub...thank you...but...I..." My voice was shaking.

"I'm afraid that news ... isn't totally fake."

"Huh?! What?!" P'Wayu was so shocked, he dropped his spoon.

"Wait! You already lost your virginity to P'In?"

"What? No! It's not like that."

I was freaking out. P'Wayu's thoughts went too far.

"It isn't like that...it's just...uh..."

I felt so awkward that I didn't know how to explain. It was so shameful.

"Alright. I got it. You like P'In, don't you?" P'Wayu said.

"Huh...uh...yes." My face blushed.

"How did you know?" I asked.

"Hahaha, because I'm an expert." P'Wayu shrugged proudly.

"I can't explain. I just feel it."

"But...I'm a male, but I also like a male. Isn't it weird?" I lowered my head.

"Hm? Why is it weird? Male or female, we are all human. Why does a person's preference of the same or different gender matter?"

P'Wayu said it was very normal for him, which made me feel so relieved even though I was still a little depressed.

"But...P'In..." I said sadly.

"He doesn't like me that way."

"Hmm?"

My words made P'Wayu frown.

"Wait..." P'Wayu was thinking.

"I don't think so. I think you're wrong."

"What? What did I say wrong?" I couldn't get it.

"How about this? Let's do a test, shall we?" He had a cunning expression on his face.

"Test?" I was intrigued.

"Bring the mug and sit here."

P'Wayu beckoned me to sit on the sofa with him, and then he opened his phone camera.

"N'Win, saimai[1], smile~" P'Wayu said before he clicked away. Then, he selected the one with the best angle and applied a filter.

We were both holding a cup of vanilla-cola each in the photo.

"Alright!"

P'Wayu adjusted the photo a little, opened the LINE application and clicked on a group chat named 'Kwang is big boss here'.

"What are you going to do?" I asked.

"Well, this is a personal group for UNISTAR members and P'Kwang." P'Wayu explained while sending our photo to the group.

Wayunilla: (Sent photo)

Wayunilla: Met a cutie. Invited for lava.

I was so shocked! Wait...did he just send our selfie to that group?

It didn't take a second before a 'Read 1' appeared.

Handsome Natee: Hey, no eyes. Your room is so damn disgusting. How many cockroaches are in there? An army of them right?

"What the fuck? That badass dog always insults me. So annoying." P'Wayu murmured.

Kwang krub: Hey! You promised to diet. Stop eating silly things!

Leo' Ratchapol: N'Wayu. You should clean your room. I'm afraid you might fall ill one day.

The Sea at the Night: Haha. Be careful, I might just forward to DomWhai ;)

The replies were from the other UNISTAR members. However, P'Wayu didn't pay attention to them at all.

"4 read....oh everyone has read it now." P'Wayu seemed very excited.

"One...two...three...four...five..."

P'Wayu was counting and looking at me. I was still confused.

"Wait...Why hasn't P'In replied yet? It shows that everyone has already read it." P'Wayu said, scratching his head.

What...? So he did all that just to get P'In's attention?

"Hmm..." P'Wayu looked less confident by now.

"Or maybe what you said earlier is right."

While I had no idea what P'Wayu had been doing, and while P'Wayu was contemplating by himself...

This room's bell rang. We both flinched.

"Oh...don't tell me..." P'Wayu grinned.

He hurried to the door, so I just followed him.

P'Wayu looked through the peephole, then he turned excitedly.

"Yes! It's him!" P'Wayu told me.

"Uh..who?" I was trying to help him open the door, but he stopped me.

"Wait, not yet. Let me take a look at that jealous face first."

"Hm?" I didn't understand him.

I was startled, as the longer we took to open the door, the more impatient the ringing became. It seemed like the person outside had an urgent matter with P'Wayu. However, P'Wayu didn't seem annoyed or shocked, he just laughed so hard.

"P'Wayu. Should we open the door?" I was worried, as the ringing showed no sign of stopping. I was afraid the bell would break.

"Alright, alright." P'Wayu held his laugh and acted normal. Then, he opened the door.

"Oh! P'In. How come?" P'Wayu faked his surprise when he saw P'In.

P'In? I was stunned as I saw the person behind the door.

P'In was standing there. His expression solemn, his eyes restless.

"Or do you wanna join us for Lava?" P'Wayu asked, smiling.

Despite that, P'In didn't pay attention to P'Wayu. He just looked at me with a serious face.

"Cat food ran out," P'In said. "Let's buy together."

"What? Cat food?" I blinked. Why did he just talk about cat food? And why did he invite me?

"P'In, it's already late. Your stray cat can find food on its own." P'Wayu said.

P'In didn't answer him. While I was still confused, he just grabbed my arm and dragged me out of P'Wayu's room.

"P'In..." I exclaimed.

"Wait, P'In. He hasn't finished eating Lava with me yet." P'Wayu acted like he was fretful.

P'In, however, gave P'Wayu a cold gaze, silencing P'Wayu.

"Let's go," P'In told me. So I just nodded unconsciously.

"Uh...Okay." I didn't know how to reject him. So I could only follow him without even understanding the situation.

I looked back at P'Wayu, intending to say sorry, but P'Wayu just gave me a big smile and a thumbs up.

Huh? Wait.

What was happening here was all intended by P'Wayu?

☽------------☽

Footnote : 

[1]  'Saimai' means cotton candy in Thai.