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ลำดับตอนที่ #1 : EP01: Yes, I am an antagonist
1...
I can't believe I start a journal in this supposed sketch diary just because of some story I stumbled upon on the internet. Oh well, might as well expose myself to a note that can't even give me an advice. If you want to know, I'll satisfy you by saying that this is a book with a hard, coral cover consists of a sentence of 'maYBE i'm a mERmaiD.' It is so ridiculous how one would mix capital letters with lowercase letters in one word.
2...
Don't worry. This is not a what-I-did-today kind of diary, so you can go ahead and stop reading if you start skimming through this just to know how bad my day went. If you haven't figured that out already, I'll kindly inform you that all there is to this note is me complaining, being sarcastic, and looking down on others. Like I said, I'm an antagonist.
3...
I don't understand why people stare at their crush, secretly, mind you. They stare when they think no one sees and quickly avert their eyes when the stared object as much as turns around to grab something out of their bags. Why they don't approach the person and tell them 'I like you' is beyond me. It's not like staring at them will make them fall in love with you.
4...
I do realize that for someone as talented as me, my routine is rotting my capability away. I should be more eager to study like some of my friends, but, somehow, the idea of trying too much doesn't sit right with me. Am I too proud of myself? Nah, I think I'm just a person who doesn't want to look foolish by trying too hard and fail. Not that I will. Some confidence I have there.
5...
I like to think of myself as a teenager with a sarcastic mind. Why just the mind? Because I rarely voice it out. When confronted with rude people, I merely gave them a blank stare from the bridge of my nose along with superior air around my posture. Maybe it is my false sense of baseless confidence. Or Maybe it is their own inferior traits that tell them to back down.
6...
People - complex, difficult, too many, too overwhelming, trouble
7...
As the one who prides myself on destroying other people with my sharp tongue and harsh, polite words, I sure live up to the standard. I am not the one who talks the most amongst friends. I also dislike spitting useless insults just to satisfy myself with shallow cuss words. That is why whenever I aim to hurt someone, they better be hurt for the rest of their life. Or five years at the least.
8...
Why I am showing my true self to any of you is beyond me. Because I think my personality is the best one could ever ask for? Maybe.
9...
There is a profound satisfaction seeing some people overwork themselves to get better at the thing they love just to be stepped on by me, who don't really try. Sometimes fate can be harsh. Poor them.
10...
This kind of conversation seems to occur far too often.
A: That kid is unnerving.
B: Who?
A: That one standing right there. The one with headphones.
B: Oh, him. Yes, he irritates me too.
Then I walk past them just to see what they will do.
A: Oi!
Me: Yes? To what do I owe the pleasure?
A: Your face irritates me.
I stopped and stared at him. With me being a few feet away from them, they seemed to realize that I'm much taller. I easily towered over both of them.
Me: I am sorry, then. Seems like I am an eyesore for sempai since we're of a different caliber.
Then I sneered at them and walked away.
11...
I had always thought someone would be out to get me. I had been expecting it for quite a while since there were so many people who got pissed off just because they couldn't take my word. What I did not think, though, was that the first one who approached me would be a lanky first-year with timid posture.
I looked up from the psychology textbook which I had been reading for the past half an hour. For the love of God, this kid was trembling on his feet.
"They will let me be if I punch you."
"Oh?" I realized at that moment that I must sound like I was at the top of my game to him. "Care to give me the name?"
"I'm sorry," the kid said instead, avoiding looking at him in the eyes. I guessed my gaze was that intimidating.
He seemed to brace himself for the worst when I said, "Well then, have your way with it. I still have half a chapter to cover for a quiz, so you better do it quick."
Lord, that face was priceless, but he didn't hesitate when he pulled his fist and landed it square on my jaw. Wow, for a kid this skinny, he sure was quite strong.
12...
This is so boring. Someone please breaks into my house.
13...
I believe that emotion is not something you express from the bottom of your heart. Instead, it is a learned behavior. When you were young, you watched how your parents and people around reacted and copied it. It is as easy as that. I might give out quite an evil impression, but do I have emotion? Debatable. Everyone has emotions, even heartless criminals. Even someone as unlikable as me has emotions, though people can't see it. What makes me different from others is that I repress it well. For me, feelings are private. Anyone who lets it show for the world to see is a fool, one kind or another. And why don't I express my feelings? Because I'm not a fool.
14...
When your hands grace the sky, you know you are at the top.
15...
Willpower and devotion can't always defeat talent, is what I learned during high school. I had a classmate whom I considered close to me to some degree. She studied a lot and went to cram school every weekend and after school from right after school ended to ten at night. I could simply say she was serious with her study and grades. But, she had never exceeded me, who immediately went home after school to play games and watch video on YouTube, didn't go to any cram school, skipped classes I didn't like, and made a half-ass attempt at reviewing lessons before an exam. Like I said, sometimes you can try and try and end up at the same level as talent. But most of the time, you will just do better than what you used to and still fall a step behind the talented. That also applies to myself. Never once have I thought practice can defeat talent.
16...
People have a different preference. Some prefer money over the internet. Some prefer lying in bed rather than getting up for food. As for me, nothing can be more important than an MP3 with good quality headphones. Being as socially inept and anti-social as I am, headphones block unwanted noise from irritating me.
17...
There were rumors about me going around the school. From what I picked up during lunch, people said that I am an unlikable first year with an unapproachable attitude. Some saying about me pissing some third years off and got into a fight seemed to be around although I hardly recalled doing anything remotely to that degree.
Well, not like I care. Whatever other people said had never been able to bother me since I didn't give any of them importance. It was too small of a matter to be able to catch my attention most of the time. On the bright side, those rumors kept others away from me, so I could have peaceful days. If I really thought about it, I was quite thankful to whoever spreading the rumors.
18...
Boring. Why can't there be a skip class pass for students who already know everything?
19...
This after-school ice cream gathering was so pointless. Why did I let these idiots drag me to the store again?
20...
Saika seemed to be down. I guessed something (someone?) was bothering him.
21...
Something unusual happened. Namiya tried to lure him out to a local coffee shop with him by saying he would buy Saika a chocolate shake. And Saika said no. Apparently, that offended him so much that Namiya came, desperate, into my classroom, making a scene about how Saika would die if he refused a free chocolate shake. Namiya was being annoying so I told him that maybe he found a bitter drink.
22...
Saika started to be too annoying. And Namiya kept talking about how to figure out what drink Saika liked. I will have to do something, or my uneventful day would be long gone.
23...
For someone as small as Ichinose, he could be a little ball full of shit. Although he fled as soon as I approached him head-on. So much to say for a manly man he prided himself to be. Pff.
24...
I shouldn't have been worried. Turn out the idiot was just shocked because his weight went up to 70 kg. He would turn back to his usual self, spending an unhealthy amount of time thinking about chocolate shake and dessert, in no time.
25...
Wow. Saika is really an idiot. Period.
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There will be a Thai version of this story too! I wrote this story in English before translating into Thai, so if you are fluent in both, you will notice that my English version sound smoother than the Thai version.
You can find Thai Version here.
>> Thai Version here <<
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